Chinese Translation Into English

An article was published in the Economist in 2010, to the effect that the English language would eventually be replaced by translation technology tools, which would accurately translate indigenous languages to English: 

Chinese Travel Brochure

Getting There: Our representative will make you wait at the airport. The hotel bus runs along the lake and you will feel pleasure in passing water.You will know the hotel is near, because you will go round the bend.The manager will have intercourse with all new guests.

The Hotel: This is a family hotel, so adultery and children are welcome. Nurses are available in the evenings to put down your children. Guests are invited to conjugate in the bar and expose themselves to others. But please note that ladies are not allowed to have their babies in the bar. We organize social games, so no guest is ever left alone to play with himself.

Your Room: Every room has excellent facilities for your private parts. In winter, every room is on heat. Each room has a balcony offering views of outstanding obscenity. Please feel free to ring for the chambermaid and take advantage of her.

Hospitality: When you leave us at the end of your holiday, you will struggle to forget it.