Public Meeting Announcements

The Alzheimers Meeting will not continue if people keep forgetting to come.

Despite rumours to the contrary, the AA meeting is not being held at O'Malley's Bar.

The Yacht Club will not allow disruptive members to scuttle proceedings.  

At the request of those wishing to attend, the Procrastinators Meeting has been postponed to next week.

The Anger Management Meetings will not tolerate any more arguing and fighting among attendees.

The Green Party meeting this week will feature a talk on the benefits of open cast mining and deep sea oil extraction. 

Those going to the Megalomaniac AGM must in future not try to take control of the meeting.

At the request of members, the Weightwatchers Meeting this week will feature a luncheon of deep fried chicken or a burger with fries, followed by cream cakes or scones and clotted cream.

Homonyms

Homonyms: Words that have the same spelling and pronunciation, but different meanings.

Mozart was feeling out of sorts, but then he composed himself.

The minister's wife loved her pasta.

They wanted a jetty because their beautiful seaside town was without peer.

The rock group was so loud they were banned.

The businessman never courted his secretary because she wasn't his type.

The surfer fell off his board when the pretty girl gave him a wave. 

He fixed it in just 60 seconds because it was only a minute problem.

He hated sweeping up the driveway in autumn so decided to leave it.

The hunter felt that unsuccessfully searching for pigs was such a bore. 

The pensioner regularly caught the bus as the ticket price was fair.

The medieval fancy dress party was a great night out.