Thursday, July 31, 2014

Children Need Commendation & Interest Shown

My father never told me he loved me. He never commended me once for anything. However, he did tell me if I I ever made a mistake. That was not uncommon for his generation.

I joined a local sports team when young. My mum said that on one occasion she did go along, people were saying from the sideline "He'll play for NZ one day". I'm not saying that would have transpired, but I must have been good. My dad didn't come to watch me and when mum told him what people were saying or if I told him how a game went, he was disinterested.

When I brought home anything I made at school I would show him. He would look it over, point out any mistakes he could find, and hand it back. I would stand there with my head down and mum would ask that he say something nice and he would say "Very nice" in an insincere way. I came to believe I was hopeless and any commendation I got was to make me feel better, not because I was any good.

Despite that we always had food, clothing and a roof over our head. I always got on with my dad otherwise, and when my parents got older, I converted the lower floor in my home into a flat where they lived. He got cancer, and was nursed at our home. When the night nurse called us at 2am to say he was going, I went to his bedside and held his hand.

As an adult I gradually came to realise that I did have some talent, and I began to believe in myself. I understood the power of specific commendation and I hand it out freely. It costs nothing - but the effort to observe and a little time taken - to express appreciation. When I see the smile and how it makes others feel, it gives me something back too.

I am sorry that my dad didn't give himself the pleasure of seeing his son glowing after some commendation. He just couldn't do it. He did try harder after he studied the Bible and tried to apply it's loving advice. Once he came home from work and brought me a lovely expensive toy, one that I really wanted. There was no reason or special occasion. I looked up at his face and saw the pleasure he got giving it to me. For the first time I felt loved by him and that feeling was priceless. It was not the toy that was the gift I received that day.

Commendation and interest must be children by their parents. Children don't need things. They need to feel loved, boys especially by their dads. In the end I came to realise I was.

Saturday, July 26, 2014

Children Need To Learn Fear

When I was about three years old, we lived next to a large building with a roof shaped as the one here in the picture. At the rear of the building there was a small shed attached. Some boys around the seven year mark decided to climb onto the shed, then onto the roof.

I wanted to join them, so they finally agreed to hoist me up too. The problem is for a reason I don't know, they all decided to leave and forgot about me. Not that I was worried as I happily walked along the top of the structure, where it was nearly flat.

I remember my mother walking out of our unit carrying a washing basket. I remember her voice as she used my full name and in a steady but fearful tone told me slowly "Sit down". She kept doing that until sensed I was in a place of danger and complied. I was told "Don't move" and knew this wasn't good.

Then I recall the top of a ladder appearing, then a man's head. He held out his arms and I walked toward him. I remember feeling the roof fall away as I reached him and feeling apprehensive. I got a hug from mum, who wanted to know how I got up there. My brother got a stern telling off. He protested I insisted until they relented.

What I learned was I felt no fear until I sensed it in my mother's voice. Then I realised it was dangerous. Children don't see danger, they have to be taught it. A heater element, a power socket (I stuck scissors into one of those once and got a real kick out of it), the road. Those and many other dangers exist for a child. Parents have to teach about all those things.

There are other dangers too, moral ones. In this world of moral decay, children may not recognise the risks associated with certain behaviour. Letting them find out for themselves would be like letting me walk along the high roof and leave me to find out the dangers. Responsible parents teach their children moral virtue because this world won't. The Bible is an excellent yardstick for standards.

So whether it be physical or moral dangers, children need to learn fear. Fear of potentially hurtful actions. That is how they are protected.

Wednesday, July 23, 2014

The Older Generation And The Telephone

The older generation has often resisted new technologies. When they are reluctantly embraced, they are sometimes not used in the way others do. An example of this was of an elderly man many years ago who was one of the last to get a telephone.

Shortly afterward a friend popped by to have a yarn. While they conversed, the telephone rang....and rang...and rang. The elderly homeowner made no attempt to answer it. The visitor blurted out "Well aren't you going to answer it?"

The elderly man bluntly replied "No".

The visitor was confused and said "Why not?"

The curt response was "I got the darned thing installed for my convenience, not everyone else's".

Saturday, July 19, 2014

The Snow Plough

On a bitterly cold winter morning a husband and wife in Dublin were listening to the radio during breakfast. They heard the announcer say, "We are going to have 8 to 10 inches of snow today. You must park your car on the even-numbered side of the street, so the snow plough can get through."

So the good wife went out and moved her car.

A week later while they are eating breakfast again, the radio announcer said, "We are expecting 10 to 12 inches of snow today. You must park your car on the odd-numbered side of the street, so the snow plough can get through".

The good wife went out and moved her car again.

The next week they are again having breakfast, when the radio announcer says, "We are expecting 12 to 14 inches of snow today. You must park...." Then the electric power went out.

The good wife was very upset, and with a worried look on her face she said, "I don't know what to do. Which side of the street do I need to park on so the snow plough can get through?"

Then with the love and understanding in his voice that all men who are married exhibit, the husband replied, "Why don't you just leave the car in the garage this time."

Sunday, July 13, 2014

Children: Cannot Be Trusted

Parents cannot trust their little ones. They have to be there for them because curious minds are insatiable. My mother was aware of that and maybe saved my life.

We were on a ship and I was just under three years old. Children ate the evening meal first, were put into a creche, then parents ate afterward. The first day, my mother observed the young lady in charge of the children was more interested in her nails than her charges. Dad wanted to get to dinner, insisting I would be fine. Mum insisted they stand outside the creche for a while.

My older brother and I on the liner. Going back a bit in time

Very soon the door handle dropped, the door opened and I toddled onto the deck of the ocean liner. Had I gone over the side, no one would have even heard the splash. My mother went in to she the young attendant still doing here nails and blissfully unaware of my departure. A brief but emphatic reminder from my mother of the young lady's responsibility was delivered.

After that, every time I was dropped off I was met by this very attentive staff member who never let me out of her sight. When my parents came to pick me up, she was never more than a metre away from me. It's amazing what threats to a person's well being can do.

Children are the parent's responsibility and if they have to be placed in someone else's care, the parents must be sure they are going to protect the child as they would. Kiddies are too inexperienced to see danger. That's what care givers are for, to see those dangers for them and gradually teach them to be aware of such. That is why I say children cannot be trusted.

Thursday, July 10, 2014

A Weird Fungi

Near where I live I found this unusual fungi. I don't know what it is but it is new to me.

Tuesday, July 8, 2014

Gardening Tips For Ladies (Of All Ages)

A teenage granddaughter comes downstairs for her date with this see-through blouse on. Her grandmother just goes ballistic, telling her not to dare go out like that! The teenager tells her 'Loosen up Grams.. These are modern times. You gotta let your rose buds show!' And out she goes.

The next day the teenager comes down stairs, and the grandmother is sitting there with a flimsy sheer blouse. The teenager wants to die. She explains to her grandmother that she has friends coming over and that it is just not appropriate. The grandmother says, 'Loosen up, Sweetie. If you can show off your rose buds, then I can display my hanging baskets.

Friday, July 4, 2014

Parachute vs Plane

A parachutist and an aeroplane tangled recently at an airfield. No one was badly hurt, but it could have been so much worse. I would have thought the parachutist in the wrong, but either way a lucky escape for both.

Wednesday, July 2, 2014

Irish Sausages

A customer asked, "In what aisle could I find the Irish sausages?"

 The assistant asks, "Are you Irish?"

 The guy, clearly offended, says, "Yes I am, but let me ask you something. If I had asked for Italian sausage, would you ask me if I was Italian? Or if I had asked for German Bratwurst, would you ask me if I was German? Or if I asked for a kosher hot dog would you ask me if I was Jewish? Or if I had asked for a Taco, would you ask if I was Mexican? Or if I asked for Polish sausage, would you ask if I was Polish?" Or if I asked for “Biltong, would you ask if I was South Afrikaans?”

 The assistant says, "No, I probably wouldn't."

 The guy says, "Well then, just because I asked for Irish sausage, why did you ask me if I'm Irish?"

 The assistant replied, "Because you're in a hardware store!"

Tuesday, July 1, 2014

No One Sneeze!

Brian Berg is a professional card stacker. He uses no glue, tape or any tricks to assemble his structures. To see his website, simply click here.