A woman asked, "Do airlines put your physical description on your bag so they know who's luggage belongs to who? When I checked in, they put a tag on my luggage that said FAT. I'm overweight"The city code for Fresno is FAT, the airline was just putting a destination tag on her luggage.
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A man asked, "How do I know which plane to get on? I was told my flight number is 823, but none of these darn planes have numbers on them."
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A woman said "I need to fly to Pepsi-cola on one of those computer planes."
I asked if she meant to fly to Pensacola on a commuter plane.
She said, "Yeah, whatever."
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A business man asked about the documents he needed in order to fly to China. I reminded him he needed a visa.
"Oh no I don't, I've been to China many times and never had to have one of those."
When I told him his stay required a visa this he said, "I've been to China four times and every time they have accepted my American Express."
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A woman called to make reservations, "I want to go from Chicago to Hippopotamus, New York"
The agent was at a loss for words. Finally, the agent said "Are you sure that's the name of the town?"
"Yes, what flights do you have?" replied the customer.
After some searching, the agent came back with, "I'm sorry, ma'am, I've looked up every airport code in the country and can't find a Hippopotamus anywhere."
The customer retorted, "Oh don't be silly. Everyone knows where it is. Check your map!"
The agent scoured a map of the state of New York and finally offered, "You don't mean Buffalo, do you?"
"That's it! I knew it was a big animal"
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