Puns

I went fishing with Rod and Annette.

I went into a car dealer and the salesman said: "Take a SEAT".

A work colleague always had a telephone to his ear to make the boss think he was busy, but there was no one on the line. What a phoney?

I go nuts over cashews.

I was talking to an expert about insect nests. His name was Anthony Hill. He said, "Just call me Ant Hill".

A gymnastics instructor provided a schedule for all his pupils. When one objected, he replied it was important to be flexible.

I am very good as a lifeguard at the swimming pool. I fact, the boss says I've really made a splash.

At work, we always agree with each other. When we decided to carpool, we were in one Accord.

At a meeting, we were invited to stand if we were able. So I remained seated, although funnily, everyone else seemed to have the name Abel.

The Beauty of a Tree

Spelling Blunders

Sometimes spell check doesn't work because the wrong word typed is a legitimate word. It can be embarrassing. Here are a few examples.

On a job application to a boss who is vertically challenged:

"Look forward to hearing from you shorty" (shortly).

Writing to someone known to grovel to important people:

"I hope your meeting with the visiting CEO goes well toady" (today).

Communicating with a well-endowed woman:

"I understand you are really busty" (busy).

To a heavy person:

"I expect a prompt reply as you are known to be fat" (fast).

A note to a man named Raymond:

"May I call you Rat?" (Ray).

Finally a message on the computer: