Quit When You Are Ahead

A very pretty young speech therapist was getting absolutely nowhere with her Stammer’s Action Group. She had tried every technique in the book, but still they stammered and stuttered. Finally, totally exasperated, she said: "If any of you can tell me where you were born, without stuttering, you can come out with me for an evening at a nightclub."

The thought of going out with such a pretty lady got then trying really hard to beat the stuttering.

The Englishman immediately piped up:
"B-b-b-b-b-b-b-irmingham".

"That's no use, Trevor" said the speech therapist,
"Who's next?"

The Scotsman raised his hand and blurted out:
"G-g-g-g-g-g-gl-lasgow".

“That's no better either, Hamish. Now, how about you, Paddy?”

The Irishman took a deep breath, counted to 5, clenched both fists at his sides and eventually blurted out:. . . . . “London ".

“Absolutely Brilliant, Paddy!” said the speech therapist."You win the night out".

..."d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-erry".

Toilets With A Difference

For those who like an audience...
or it that where the queue starts?

Some people do things half heartedly

Is this a man's revenge for constantly being
reminded to put the seat down?

Communal living has never appealed to me

My wife and I do everything together..
well not quite everything

This is the love birds edition

Things I Know...

Wisdom is like money, a little more is always useful.

I like to help others but I definitely need more discernment in deciding when I should help and when to let others get on with it. Your sincere efforts can come back to bite you.

One side of the story is sounds convincing but then so does the other side too, when you finally hear it. 

Someone I know once criticised his wife over how she handles money and he was so convincing. I later got her side of the story and he was as bad - if not worse - than she was in that area.



Be a good forgiver for we all need to be forgiven at times.

It surprises me how few can pull this one off. People can hold grudges mercilessly. A successful marriage for example is dependent on being forgiving, as of course any relationship. As a bonus, it is so good for your health too.

Telling the truth is the best policy in the long run.

When I dealt with customers I always told them the truth even if I felt embarrassed by it. It was surprising how well people took it when you sincerely confessed an oversight. I recall a colleague lying to a customer and getting into a mess trying to dig herself out of it when the customer smelt a rat. One lie led to another.