Saturday, August 8, 2015

You've Made Your Bed.....

When I was young a popular saying of my parents - mum in particular - was 'You've (or they've) made your bed, now you have to lie in it'. If people complained about a problem they have brought on themselves, that was the comment passed. It was a reminder to me that when we make a decision, we must accept its consequences.

In my youth, people were encouraged to look at themselves if problems occurred. We now live in a world where people usually look to blame anything or anyone else for bad things in their life, as if nothing negative could possibly be the fault of the individual on the receiving end. The problem must lie elsewhere. Self accountability is a no go area.

Some things are beyond our control and some bad things are from external sources. We may not be even able to change the situation to avoid it. So how do we deal with issues, whether we were the source of the problem or not? In both instances we need to look at ourselves, and there we will find one of two things.

One, when we were to blame, we need to change something to avoid a repeat.

If I could kick up the rear the person responsible for each of my woes, I wouldn't be able to sit down for a week.

The other is when we were not at fault. Then we should work out how to handle such an event if it happens again and do it better next time.

Hurt me once and shame on you. Hurt me twice and shame on me. 

The point is we need to learn how to anticipate the negative so we can preempt what is to happen, or at least know how to handle a sudden problematic situation constructively. Admittedly, that is easier said than done. However, just letting things happen and moaning afterward is foolish. Trying to take control by stopping or mitigating the bad is the way to help ourselves.

There are those who watch things happen and those who make things happen. 

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